way to comment on the last entry guys!

lolzanywayz.

new tattoo and new hair!

massachussets for the weekend, be home on monday <3

yesterday i went to the city and hung out with kevin.
it was amazing.
i was waiting in the lobby, looking down at my sidekick and then suddenly somebody just jumps on me and i look up and it's my friend tammy ahaha and she wouldnt let me go but when she finally did, i saw kevin, donna, giovanni and ambika all there and i've missed everybody sososo much and it was just so overwhelming to see them again.

so we stood around and talked to everybody for a while and they were like OMG YOU LOOK SO GOOD OMG YOU'VE LOST SO MUCH WEIGHT OMG I LOVE YOUR HAIR OMG I LOVE YOUR LIP RING OMGOMGOMG YOU LOOK SO HOT hahahah it was great.

so then me and kevin walked ambika to the train station, then went to j&r [its like best buy but cooler] and got me a digital camera cause i haaaated my old one. my new one is supa kewl.

then we went to the movies and saw pirates of the carribean 2. OMG BEST MOVIE EVER?! ahahah i say that about every single movie i watch but seriously. it was just ridiculously good. johny depp is the most beautiful man i've ever seen in my life. keira knightley is GORGEOUS. she's my favorite actress, i love her in every single movie i've ever seen her in. orlando bloom sucked but what else is new lolz.

then we took the train together and i went to the ferry and it was kind of one of the most amazing moments ever. i was on the ferry, sitting on the floor outside and it was beautiful out, it was about 11 o clock at night, so it was pitch black but the city was all lit up, and the wind was blowing through my hair as i listened to my ipod, and the smell of the sea was all around us, and there were so many different people on the boat - families, couples, teenagers, older people, "punks" "emos" "normal people" just everyone with a common destination, no matter how different we were, we were all going to the same place, and i dont know, i just saw such beauty in that. there was no fighting, no judgment, everybody was just calmed by the beautiful night.

anywayyyyy today i cant move at all ahahaha its kay though. tomorrow imma go get highlights put in my hair and go get my tattoo. today i just gotta go get my eyebrows waxed and get some sea salt before my lip falls off.

TWO MORE DAYS TILL MASSACHUSSETS HOLY SHIT IMMA DIE.

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y246/hearmewhisper/Pirates20of20the20Carribean202_1024.jpg
i tried to make that a picture but for some reason xanga wouldnt let me?

weird.

but that was my favorite part of the whole movie. he's so great.

derek bloom and ricky terror.

in my pants now. plz!

Currently Listening Page Avenue By Story of the Year see related

i didnt like yesterday. it kinda sucked hardcore.

last night for some reason, i got hella lonely. and hella "omg im the ugliest person on earth."

and it was weird cause that's never ever happened to me before. i dont know why last night was so different.

& i started thinkign about jonathan and like. he's getting married soon and im sitting here by myself, you know? like, how is that fair? hes the cheater and the liar yet he comes out on top? and here i am, in love with somebody who i will never, ever have. not completely, anyway.

im just sick of falling asleep alone. im sick of not having anybody to hold hands with or kiss or cuddle and watch movies with. yet at the same time, i couldve had that a couple of times after we broke up but i wasn't ready for it and i ran away from it. am i truly ready for it now or will i do the same thing? i dont want to hurt another guy like i hurt adam and julian but at the same time i dont want to keep hurting myself either.

IDK. STUPID BOYS. I HATE EM ALL.

but today shall be better. because aubrey and i are gonna watch the notebook and it'll be amazing.

then in just 10 days, i'll be at katie's house with krisse and it'll be the best thing ever.
and in 23 more days i'll be at aubrey's house with erin and it'll be the best thing ever times 2.
&& in 24 more days aubrey, erin and i will be at warped tour and it'll be greatgreatgreat.
annnnnnnd in 28 more days i'll be at warped with krisse, katie and emilie and we're gonna see all time low and they make me HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY. eeeeeeep.

if you guys havent yet, go to www.myspace.com/alltimelow and listen to them. they're amazing and they will make you fall in love with them.

Make it a sweet, sweet goodbye - it could be for the last time and it's not right.
"Don't let yourself get in over your head," he said.
Alone and far from home we'll find you...

Dead - Like a candle you burned out;
spill the wax over the spaces left in place of angry words.
Scream - To be heard, like you needed any more attention;
throw the bottle, break the door, and disappear.

Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams, waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."
Forever's never seemed so long as when you're not around it's like a piece of me is missing.
I could have learned so much from you but what's left now?
Don't you realize you brought this family a world of pain?
Can't you see there could have been a happy ending we let go?

Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams, waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."

Sing me to sleep (You've taken so much with you...)
I'll see you in my dreams, (But left the worst with me...),
waiting to say, "I miss you. I'm so sorry."

lullabies by all time low.

they are the love of my life. i fell asleep listening to them last night and they kinda helped make things a little better.

okay so. im really sorry for that last entry.
i wrote it when i was REALLY upset but now im much better.

basically sonny's health is the only thing that matters to me and i'll sacrifice whatever i need in order for him to be healthy again. all i want is for him to be okay again.

and they're going to be touring in the fall and then again in febuary so it'll be even better because they'll all be so well rested and it'll be truly great.

so thanks everybody for putting up with me when i went psycho :]

KAY SO!
on tuesday erin and i went to the cute is what we aim for show at cbgb and after lots of worrying that she couldnt get in, we finally did get in and we were the very first people to walk in and it felt amazing. cause its CBGB, the most legendary punk club in ny, probably in america. and its closing down and we got to be there before it did and we sat on stage and felt like the coolest people ever.

so matchmakers played first. they were good. i stole their setlist haha.

then came all time low. and holyshitholyshitholyshit. they're my new favorite band. theyre so fucking good its sick. and i swear im not just saying that because every single member is fucking gorgeous and i would like to have sex with all of em. everybody should check them out if i havent made you already: www.myspace.com/alltimelow
im completly head over heels in love with the bassist, zack. holy goooooood god. i saw him before the show and kind of couldnt breathe every time he walked past me?

then was boys like girls, another VERY good band. and paul is pretty much the most beautiful man ive ever seen in my life. just wow.

then forgive durden or whatever came out. i honestly thought they were horrible. they were just too loud and noisy and like wtf.

finallyyyy at like 10:45 cute came out. they were amazing, shaant has such an unbelievable stage presence. but they only played like 3 or 4 songs? we were all hella mad about that.

after the show ended, me and erin went and found band members and talked to them and took pics and stuff. and ahahaha i took a picture with paul from blg and he TOTALLY groped me and it was amazing.

thennn we got hugs from shaant and ahahah he was so annoyed cause he was in the middle of arguing with somebody and i was just like SHAANT HEY SHAANT CAN WE GET HUGS NOW PLZ ahahha he was so mad it was great.

so then we hailed cabs and stuff and yeah.

yesterday i went to kmart to buy some new stuff for my roooom and then at night i went to see my cousin perform stand-up at ny comedy club and it was just so surreal seeing him up there i was so proud.

then todayyyyy i finally finished my room and it looks absolutely beautiful :]

matchmaker pics:

all time low pics:

WERE GOING TO MAKE BABIES TOGETHER.

boys like girls pics:

HI PAUL YOURE GORGEOUS MARRY ME?

cute pics:

and and and me and zack before the show cause erins my hero and took a pic of us.
I LOOK RETARDED DONT LOOK AT ME LOOK AT HIM

and now for my rooooooom:

tinkerbell is my fave ever.

wow. long ass update. my bad?